Things are going great…you are falling for this guy… and picturing what kind of wedding you want and where you would live and…. SCREEETCH!
Here is the problem; it’s only been 5 dates!!!
After five dates, 10 dates, even 20 dates, he is still someone you are getting to know.
You have to run your dating life like you would run a successful company. You would never interview someone, hire that person and in one month hand over the keys to your company!
Why do you do the equivalent of that when you date????
What men want more than anything in a relationship is the ability to earn your love. They may not realize it in exactly that way but men are action-oriented by nature. Biologically, they are the hunters. It is in a man’s nature to want to win your affection and share with you. However, it is your job, as a woman, to manage and direct that energy.
First and foremost, remember, YOU ARE THE CEO. You run Company (fill in your name). Be responsible with who you hire for your company.
STEP ONE: KNOW YOUR (COMPANY’S) WORTH
A successful CEO takes her time finding the right person for the position in her company. But even before that step, she must feel like her company has worth. The person you are hiring has to add value to the company but the new hire does not create the company’s value. Meaning, without knowing your own worth, you may meet dozens of qualified candidates but you will never know which candidate will be the best for you.
You will never feel content if you expect the candidate to determine your value. Know what makes you tick or thrive before you start interviewing. Think of all your great qualities and explore things that you enjoy doing. This is not about being selfish or self-absorbed. This is about knowing yourself so that you connect to your soul. You are doing your partner a great disservice when you make your life all about him. And no one else can ever be the creator of your happiness.
STEP TWO: CHECK THE RESUME
What do I mean by that? Don’t compromise on your ‘non-negotiables.” What are non-negotiables? It is not eye color or height. They are the things that go to the core of who you are.
It may be religion. Ladies, if religion is important to you and you want to raise your children with someone who has similar beliefs, no matter how HOT the guy is, if you are truly interested in settling down, don’t date someone who is a different religion.
If you are a die-hard career driven city girl and you are introduced to a man who spends his life on a cattle ranch in the country. No matter how fascinating he may be, he is probably not a good fit for your company.
STEP THREE: THE INTERVIEW PROCESS.
The dating process is the interview process. You are getting to know someone to see if he is right for your company. He may be a great candidate but take your time with the interview process. This is an important position. By the fifth date, you should still be learning about each other to see if he is a good hire. You should not be gushing (even in your head) about how cute your children will be.
STEP FOUR: THE NEW HIRE
Even after you are hired at a corporation, it is not uncommon to have a probation period. Certainly, a new hire would not direct the board meetings. As the CEO of your company, remember, it is no different with dating. When you decide to be in a committed monogamous relationship that does not mean you are walking down the aisle. That just means you are continuing to explore and progress.
Remember ladies. Know that the growth and success of your company is in your hands.