How do we find peace and live it when so many innocent victims have lost their lives to senseless violence? How do we keep fear, sadness, anger and even hatred from becoming part of our daily lives?

In paying attention to the conversation around us, these paralyzing and polarizing sentiments are pervasive.  Now more than ever we need to find peace in our nation – in our world.

What do we do when we feel there is nothing we can do?

The latest string of terrorist attacks in Paris is terrible beyond words. It is the pain of so many, and too many to recall – the Christian schoolgirls taken by Boko Haram, the child soldiers in Darfur, the acts of violence to innocents in the United States, Israel, Nigeria, and now Paris (and so many other places)…What is so terrifying and awakening is that it it is harder and harder to push these events out of our consciousness.

There is a reason we need to be made more aware, more conscientious of the chaos around us.  It is the only possible way to affect change.

How do we stop these events from coming even closer to our home?

An article in the science section of The New York Times, Oct. 21, 2015, explains, “In a landmark study, scientists at Delft University of Technology in the Netherlands, reported that they proved one of the most fundamental claims of quantum theory — that objects separated by great distance can instantaneously affect each other’s behavior.”

What does this mean for us?  

The chaos created in our communities, with our neighbors and in our homes, ripples around the world.  Yes we know we need to find ways to be tolerant of others, we know that as an ideal; we teach our children these concepts. And where is it actually the hardest place to practice tolerance and care?  In and around our own homes with our spouses, our families and our friends.


We pray for world peace with fervor and we post pictures on social media in solidarity. But science is now backing up what spiritual leaders have been earnestly saying for years; we would be most effective in creating a peaceful world if we acted with patience and care toward the people in our orbit, the people with whom we interact daily.  We want countries that have been warring for thousands of years to come to an accord, but yet when we are aggravated, often our reaction to the people with whom we feel the closest is to scream, curse and say things that are purposefully hurtful or embarrassing.  We may become withholding or dismissive, or stick our head in the sand.  Quantum physicists are now aligned with spiritual leaders  in saying that this absolutely creates a war – in your home, in your life and in the world.

Our actions affect our environment; our behavior in our home affects the behavior in the world.

Yes, in the hustle and bustle of everyday life, people can be rude and that is unnerving; your mother-in-law’s criticism makes you crazy, your spouse ignores you and you feel marginalized. In far too many families there are rifts that seem irreparable. I do get it – often I feel pushed beyond my limits by senseless and hurtful behavior.  And yet, our reactions to each other matter – this is a plea to pay attention.

“Science is now backing up what spiritual leaders have been earnestly saying for years; we would be most effective in creating a peaceful world if we acted with goodwill, care, and regard to the people in our orbit, with the people we encounter every day.”


We all need to figure out a better, more peaceful way to react, a more peaceful way to be; let’s  start with our families and friends. This does not mean we always have to agreee; it does, however, mean that we can disagree, even dislike, and still, at a minimum, COEXIST.  At a minimum, we can be in the same room, the same world, and treat each other with regard.


That is the only way to make a difference. Take a moment’s pause and pay attention to how we react, how we behave; STOP HATING, bullying, maligning; stop being indifferent to other people’s pain – in our neighborhoods, in our communities, with our co-workers, acquaintances, people who are different from us, people who “rub us the wrong way,” our friends who have “slighted us,” our “exes” who have hurt us, our relatives who “have wronged” us. STOP BEING DESTRUCTIVE IN YOUR OWN HOME.

We live and interact with the people we profess to love the most and this is is often where we feel most at liberty to say whatever we want. Before you react when they upset you, before you put more angry and divisive words in the world, ask yourself, “Do I want to be right, or do I want to have Peace?”

Ask yourself: “Do I want Peace?”

I assure you, in all wars, both sides think they are right.

In all wars, both sides value ‘being right’ more than having peace.

Each and every time we are hurtful (because we are “right,”) with our thoughts, with our words and with our actions, we plant the seeds of war that then ripple across the world.

Please add the consciousness of peace into your own life.  Please value peace over being “right” in your own communities, with your neighbors, and so emphatically in your homes.


We do not all have to be friends.

We do not have to all agree.

We DO have to figure out how to make PEACE with each other if we want PEACE IN THE WORLD.

We are all in one universal boat.  We can continue to point fingers and drill holes – but then we will all sink.

“If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we all belong to each other.”

– Mother Theresa